Wedding Planning Chronicles: Family, Dates, and Decisions.
First Steps to Forever
Hey Royal,
It’s the first post of the wedding planning series and I hope you’re ready to dig in.
Fun fact: my wedding was on a weekday. Yep, you read that right. If you’re wondering why, I’ve always known this would be the case (see proof below).
But really, it happened because I found my person.
From the start, my man clearly disliked weekend weddings, and I couldn’t have agreed more. Thankfully, we were also on the same page regarding a lot of things.
I’ve heard people say the wedding planning period can either pull a couple closer or tear them apart, and while that’s partly true, I firmly believe you can create your own reality.
Early in our relationship, we talked about marriage and aligned on the when, where, and how. We even anticipated potential challenges and discussed how to handle them. This intentionality made wedding planning a much smoother process.
Where did it begin?
We’d been ready for a while but waited until we felt financially prepared to take the plunge.
Once we were set, we picked our dates, marked them on our calendars, left the rest to God, and informed our families.
Then, it was time to plan.
My first stop? Google. I revisited my favorite wedding website that I’d frequented in faith long before I was a bride-to-be.
Even though there was a lot I couldn’t relate to because I was having a Nigerian wedding, I was still able to create a solid checklist.
How did our families react?
Mixed feelings to be honest.
There was excitement that it was finally happening but at the same time we had just given everyone a twelve-day notice for the first event - introduction, and everyone was caught off guard.
I wouldn’t even be surprised if anyone thought I was pregnant but eventually, we made it work.
Proper planning kicked into high gear immediately after the introduction, and one thing that’s certain to come up during weddings is family. They mean well, but sometimes their opinions can be overwhelming.
So, we stood our ground on most matters.
My mum had a problem with my 150-guest idea, which meant her legion of friends and acquaintances would be excluded. You can imagine how hurt my Yoruba mother was.
My in-laws also had some questions, but thankfully, we were prepared to answer them.
Another challenge was the issue of my estranged father, whom I reluctantly invited—and in retrospect, wish I hadn’t. But, hey, let's move on to better things.
What next?
I’m a sentimental person, and my partner indulges me. So we agreed to set the date of our civil wedding for the first day we met and our traditional marriage for our dating anniversary—thankfully, both dates were weekdays.
Another fun fact: We started dating one month after we met, so our ceremonies were one month apart.
As I mentioned in my last post, I planned my wedding myself, so that checklist I made came in handy.
First, I had to figure out how to make both ceremonies work.
We’re not big fans of the Ikoyi Registry, so we chose to have our civil wedding in Ibadan with only our parents and siblings in attendance. This was logical because most of us were staying in Ibadan, and only one person—my mum—had to travel for the event.
Next, we visited the registry to make inquiries and ensure that our desired date was available. Luckily, it was!
In the next post, I’ll dive into the registry requirements, how we chose our vendors, setting up our wedding website, and how we navigated the inevitable hiccups with grace (and a few tears and laughs along the way).
Until the next Chronicle,
Stay Royal.